Friday, August 22, 2008

"Old Time Religion" Challenge!!!

Greta Christina is offering fun and prizes to whomever can come up with the best verse to "That Old Time Religion"'s evil pagan cousin, the "pagany folk nerd" parody. Check out the link for some good ones.

Because I'm such a self-aggrandizing boor, I felt compelled to post my own verse here, as well as at her blog:
We give thanks to mighty Ceres,
with her shredded wheat and Cheeri-
o's that make our bowels so clear. You
know that's good enough for me.
This won't win me any points with the choir marm, but she's not really my target audience.

Wednesday, July 9, 2008

Mmmmm, that's good Jeebus

I was raised Episcopalian (Catholic Lite--all the salvation with half the guilt! (h/t Robin Williams)), so I have some experience with seemingly loony communion traditions, but this is just...remarkable (h/t BronzeDog and Pharyngula):
Webster Cook says he smuggled a Eucharist, a small bread wafer that to Catholics symbolic of the Body of Christ after a priest blesses it, out of mass, didn't eat it as he was supposed to do, but instead walked with it.


Catholics worldwide became furious.
And wouldn't you know it, Bill Donohue got in on the act (it's been a while since Bill was last outraged, so it's good to have him back!)

My first thought on reading the article was to picture mortal sinner "walking with, talking with" the wafer, but I'm just being silly.

Walk With Me Talk With Me _Tamla Motown 1972 - Four Tops

Seriously, though, the Consecrated Host is a big deal. It must not be desecrated or sold on eBay because it literally is the body of Christ. It was recently explained to me by a devout Catholic friend that one of the reasons non-Catholics should not take Catholic communion is because of concern that Consecrated Hosts might be stolen for use in Satanic rituals. I did my best to be polite, but I find the idea kind of nutty.

I heard a similar story regarding the theft of some silver bowls and pitchers used in the Eucharist from the church I attended in my youth. There was apparently some speculation within the church that these items had been stolen for use in a Black Mass. This might overlook the more obvious explanation: that they were stolen because they are made out of silver.

Since I cannot speculate on the motivations of the host-walker (although he did return the Host), I'll limit myself to saying this: this whole thing is silly. A cracker is a cracker.

Tuesday, July 8, 2008

A belated George Carlin tribute

1937-2008. Perhaps you're in a better place, perhaps not. Or perhaps you are at total peace, living on in our memories and YouTube videos.

Tuesday, July 1, 2008

Earning our nobility

Quote of the century from PZ Myers:
Look at the bible as a pastiche, a collection of mutually and often internally inconsistent fragments slapped together for crude reasons of politics and art and priestly self-promotion and sometimes beauty and a lot of chest-thumping tribalism, and through that lens, it makes a lot of sense. It does tell us something important…about us, not some fantastic mythological being. It tells us that we are fractious, arrogant, scrappy people who sometimes accomplish great things and more often cause grief and pain to one another. We want to be special in a universe that is uncaring and cold, and in which the nature of our existence is a transient flicker, so we invent these strange stories of grand beginnings, like every orphan dreaming that they are the children of kings who will one day ride up on a white horse and take them away to a beautiful palace and a rich and healthy family that will love them forever. We are not princes of the earth, we are the descendants of worms, and any nobility must be earned.

Wednesday, May 7, 2008



No matter how many times I blink, rub my eyes, or try to wash them out with Visine, it's not going away.
[A]nother Pasco County substitute teacher's job is on the line, but this time it's because of a magic trick.

The charge from the school district — Wizardry!

Substitute teacher Jim Piculas does a 30-second magic trick where a toothpick disappears then reappears.

But after performing it in front of a classroom at Rushe Middle School in Land 'O Lakes, Piculas said his job did a disappearing act of its own.

"I get a call the middle of the day from the supervisor of substitute teachers. He says, 'Jim, we have a huge issue. You can't take any more assignments. You need to come in right away,'" he said.

When Piculas went in, he learned his little magic trick cast a spell that went much farther than he'd hoped.

"I said, 'Well Pat, can you explain this to me?' 'You've been accused of wizardry,' [he said]. Wizardry?" he asked.
I guess I'll have to stop removing my thumb to entertain kids, lest I be branded a minion of the Dark One or something.

Saturday, March 22, 2008

That didn't take long

I think the whole kerfuffle over Expelled is pretty well-known by now, so there's no need to reinvent the wheel there (vague pun intended). The latest observation from Bad Astronomy bears mentioning, though. It seems that an Expelled supporter has already invoked Godwin's Law. It's sad, really. I want the implosion of the ID movement to continue at its present rate of gemoetric growth, but I almost feel bad for the people who have permanently hitched their wagon to the movement. Almost.